My boyfriend’s insecurity is threatening our relationship

DEAR DEIDRE: I LOVE my boyfriend to bits but he worries constantly about me and other boys.

He is insecure and always gets upset if I go to a party without him.

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We have been together a year and we both know it is for the long term. I am 19, he is 21.

If I go clubbing with my mates he keeps phoning and texting me. He gets snappy if I do not answer straight away and he texted once that he wanted to die.

One of my male friends is having a party next week and he invited me on my own because he did not realise I had a ­boyfriend.

My boyfriend was so unhappy about it I told him I would not go.

He said that he was glad because he never sleeps well when I go out.

I feel like he’s trying to guilt-trip me but am I ­over-reacting?

DEIDRE SAYS: He is clearly very insecure but if you only do what he feels comfortable with, you are letting him control you.

You will eventually become unhappy and resentful. Tell him you understand he feels insecure but that it has its roots in events in his life long before you got together and you won’t be his prisoner.

My e-leaflet Dealing With Jealousy will help you both handle things.

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